Cinderella (not the 80's Hair Band!)

Dads with daughters...listen up...there's a conspiracy...

It's made up of scheming singer-songwriters who come up with new ways to bring dads to their knees, sobbing like little school children. Bob Carlisle did it with his 1997 hit Butterfly Kisses that soared to the top of the CCM (Contemporary Christian Music) charts, Pop charts, Country charts, Icelandic Yodeling charts (maybe I made that one up), etc. I guess he struck a nerve with just about everyone.

Don't get me wrong--I love that song, but I can barely listen to it without getting a big lump in my throat and crying. My two little girls (one of which is pictured to the left) like to play the song when I'm around just to see what I will do--how cruel! You think a song like that is cheesy until you have a daughter or two in your life (NOTE: Scott of Honey, I Fed the Kids...take cover, run for your life!!!!)

Ten years later CCM's hit-music-making-machine Steven Curtis Chapman enters the ring with "Cinderella" from his 2007 release called The Moment. Chapman is amazing in his ability to put out new music every few years that's popular and yet meaningful. But this song is nothing more than another attempt to turn dads with daughters into blubbering pools of tears. Just take a look...

She spins and she sways
To whatever song plays
Without a care in the world
And I'm sitting here wearing
The weight of the world on my shoulders

It's been a long day
And there's still work to do
She's pulling at me
Saying "Dad, I need you.

There's a ball at the castle
And I've been invited
And I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone...

She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed
She wants to know if I approve of the dress
She says, "Dad, the prom is just one week away
And I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

Well, she came home today with a ring on her hand
Just glowing and telling us all they had planned
She says, "Dad, the wedding's still six months away
But I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

At the time that I'm posting this blog entry, you can hear the song for free on Steven Curtis Chapman's Official Web Site. Just CLICK HERE and enjoy. (You also get to hear "Miracle of the Moment.")

Just in case you stumbled on this blog looking for something about the 80's hair band Cinderella, I don't mean to disappoint. ROCK ON!!!!

Parking Wars - Writer's Strike!

I know that it's hard to imagine, but television is actually getting worse--thanks, in part, to the Writer's Strike. If you didn't know, the Writer's Guild of America is the trade union made up of the people that write movies, television shows, plays, etc. They've been on strike since the end of October 2007.

The bottom line of the strike (from what I've been able to gather) is that the studios and television stations are making money on online content that gives no royalties to the writers. For example, let's say you write for the television show The Office. You make an agreed upon royalty every time that program is broadcast on the air--whether it be a first run event or a syndicated event, depending on the terms of your contract. However, if that same show is presented on the Internet via sites like iTunes where users pay a fee to download the show to their computer or other device, the writer makes nothing...nada...zero...zilch...bubkiss. Even if the show is played (or "streamed") for free on the television station's web site where advertising is sold, the writer still gets nothing.

By now, you've probably figured out that I'm a bit sympathetic to the writers. This explains why certain shows are not currently airing new episodes (like The Office!!!!). The Late Show With David Letterman struck up a special deal with their writers to get back on the air about a month ago. However, other shows have come back on sans writers. Just watch an episode of Late Night With Conan O'Brien to see what I mean. One night he spent five minutes making his ring spin on his desk to see how long he could keep it going--quality television.

So, that brings me to the REAL reason for this post. Yesterday, Miss Sniz and I saw a half-hour program called Parking Wars. It's a real-life look at the jobs and lives of the Philadelphia Parking Authority. What? Can't contain yourselves? Can't wait to catch an episode on A&E? Well, the waiting is over, you can watch FULL EPISODES right now on your computer. Just CLICK HERE to be taken to A&E's Video page. Click on the gray "REAL LIFE" tab on the left side of the screen and start watching.

As is the case with other shows that are broadcast online there are no royalities paid to writers when you watch Parking Wars on the Internet. But that's because shows like this don't require writers. When crap like this starts hitting the tube, it tells me that the studios and television stations must be feeling the pinch put on by the writers. Imagine, spending an entire half-hour watching a meter maid handing out tickets. Or, why experience your own real-life adventure picking up your car that's been impounded when you can watch somebody else go through it on the tv? That's entertainment!

If you thought reality TV was bad enough already, just wait. It's going to get much, much worse.

Bringing Back the Old

Lately, my wife has been participating in a Saturday blog dealio where she reposts old blog entries. The truth is, we both have some old posts that we were pretty proud of when they were written but at the time we each had one reader (i.e. she read my blog and I read hers!).

So, I'm not sure how comfortable I am with re-posting those oldies but goodies, but I suppose there are a few that I'd like to have some of you see for, perhaps, the first time. Here they are in no particular order...

1. News in HD--Yes!
I did some nice Photoshop work to make this one and I like the way it turned out.

B. How the Big League Ball Players Pitch
More Photoshop work. I'm not sure why I thought of this--possibly a vitamin deficiency or something that goes back to the 13 times I was dropped on my head as a baby.

III. What Happens at Costco, Stays at Costco (unless I share it here)
One of a handful of embarrassing stories about the stupid things I do.

So, if you're reading these for the first time, enjoy. I'll try to come up with something original tomorrow.

Coney Dog vs. Chili Dog

This weekend I've decided to open up one of the time-honored great debates of mankind: Coney Dogs vs. Chili Dogs. Actually, it's not so much of a debate. I have an opinion, but I'm more curious about yours. So, here's the question:

"Is there any difference between a coney dog and a chili dog? And, please give a reason for your answer."

This is important stuff. I need to know.

Pray

WARNING: THERE ARE SPIRITUAL OVERTONES IN THIS POST, BUT THERE'S ALSO SOMETHING FUNNY (OR PATHETIC). GO AHEAD, READ ON.

This has been a recurring theme with me lately. In church the other day we were reminded of Psalm 46:10 - "Be still, and know that I am God." It's a simple passage (even in the context of the entire Psalm) about trusting in God. He created everything in the first place and He is still in control. Praying is communication with God, but it's also trusting in the fact that He will do things in His time. It came up again when we decided to start through a book and DVD series by Philip Yancey on the subject of prayer (he's one of my favorite authors, by the way). And then, this morning I pulled up behind gold SUV with the simple message painted in big bold letters on the back of his vehicle...

Pray

How cool is that? Was God reminding little old me that I should trust in Him even when I don't understand everything that goes on in this world? I think so. Then, the "Pray" truck--which was some sort of official truck for the Indiana National Day of Prayer--took off like a bat out of hell on the interstate. He haphazardly plowed across six lanes to get in the "speed lane" and was off to the races--right on the bumper of the car ahead of him. Suddenly, the interpretation of the "Pray" message took on multiple meanings or, perhaps, a more specific meaning. "Pray" for anyone that encounters this gold SUV on the road. "Pray" that he doesn't cut you off the road into the median or a ditch. "Pray" that he doesn't drive right through your rear window.

You should always drive safe, but imagine the message you send when your car is plastered with the word, "Pray" and the web address for the Indiana National Day of Prayer.

What's wrong with yogurt today?

Is anyone else disturbed at the number of yogurt brands being introduced today that are marketed toward your bowel movements? Dannon's Activia® brand goes so far as to create the trademarked term "BIFIDUS REGULARIS." Give me a break.

I'm just not sure how "regular" it is, however, to poop out your belly button as the Dannon image seems to suggest.

Music Reviews for January 22, 2008

I thought I'd expand things a little around here by adding some CD reviews. I'm sure you all care what I think about music, so I've decided to review three CD's that I've been listening to lately.

Well, I'm not really reviewing CDs. In fact these are not real albums at all. They were created using something that I saw on my pal, Tappity's blog the other day.

You create your own band name and album with album cover (or CD--whatever). This is not a "meme" or a "tag" or whatever you folks call it, but I'd love to see what some of you come up with.

Here's how you do it.

1. The first article title on this page is the name of your band.

2. The last four words of the very last quotation on this page is the title of your album. (NOTE: If you do this more than once, you will need to refresh this page to get a new quote.)

3. The third picture on this page, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4. Use your graphics program of choice to throw them together, and post the result. I'm a Photoshop guy, but even your most basic photo editing or graphics program (even the "Paint" program that comes with Windows) can do this. It takes a little work, but it's worth it.

Here are my three CDs...

1. Auchlyne - Supposed To Do Anyway















This band is probably a lot like REM where the lead singer has the nerve to make up the lyrics to the songs after the band has already created the music and then he refuses to print them in the CD covers.

2. Skipper Bowles - ...will never be transcended
















It's the truth. Skipper Bowles will never be transcended. He was just too awesome and if you even try to transcend Skipper Bowles your bones will turn to molten lava and you will die.

3. Tokaidaigaku-mae Station - Find Yourself Up There















This one just came together perfectly. I think I'd buy this CD without knowing anything about the band based purely on the cover. Plus, if that picture is the actual band, they have to be awesome. Look at how many of them there are. I'm guessing that there are at least two people wo do nothing but play the triangle or tambourine.

Sausages!

If you haven't figured it out by now, the wife and I tend to blog-team about things--but not usually on purpose. Since we share lives, it makes sense that our blogs often follow similar paths. Honestly, she and I have both noted that since we've started blogging, we've gotten closer. Isn't that odd?

Anyway, she was having fun pointing out how easily amused I am with a new Bud Light commercial that features a talking dog who mostly says, "Sausages" or just "Sausage!" It just cracks me up and that's all there is too it, folks. I managed to find a copy of the commercial online that was NOT online as of yesterday. So, I'm not the only one who loves this spot.

Here's the link:

http://www.adchops.com/mediaHolder.php?id=2631

Follow at your own risk.

Squeeze Her Little Queen Head - Video

The other day my wife posted briefly about an episode of Don't Forget the Lyrics that we watched recently with the family. The second half of the show featured a contestant named Susan Woods who was clearly the most bizarre (and yet highly fascinating and entertaining) game show contestant I've ever seen. Since we still had the episode on the DVR, I decided to share it with the world since I've yet to see someone else post it to YouTube. Enjoy...

RIP

The signs have been obvious for quite a while now. Slow and sluggish--lacking the energy and memory of earlier days. I could see it, but I didn't want to think about it. That's how death is when it's staring right at you. You KNOW it's inevitable and yet you don't want to face it until you really have to face it. Yesterday it happened. The Samsung 80 GB hard drive on my Dell laptop kicked the bucket.

Rather than making funeral arrangements and writing an obituary, I simply went to Fry's and bought a new hard drive. This one is a Seagate 160 GB and faster--which is actually quite nice. The old one now sits in the box that the new one came in--sort of like a casket, I guess, but I threw it in my desk for safe keeping.

You might be wondering, "Did he have his system backed up for just such an event?"

YES!!!! I DID!!!! W'hoo!!!!!!

I have a 750 GB Maxtor OneTouch 4 Plus that I use for back ups and archiving really big video projects that I do at work. Right now I'm copying the contents of "My Documents" to my laptop. I've spent the past 24 hours installing useful programs like Windows XP Pro, Microsoft Office (Word, Excel, Outlook, Access, , Firefox, Powerpoint, Publisher), Adobe Creative Suite 2 (Photoshop, Illustrator, GoLive, Acrobat) and more. I still have a lot of work to do, but I'm glad that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm Back...with Random Central Florida Thoughts

When I left Orlando, it was 70 degrees and the sun was shining. Upon my return to Indianapolis it was the usual cold with "really cold" in the forecast. Honestly, I don't care either way. I actually enjoy the cold weather and the brisk air filling my nostrils as I exited the plane made me feel good--or maybe that was the exhaust fumes from the jet engines.

Here are some Random Central Florida Thoughts:

• People drive pretty slow down there. I think it has something to do with the fact that the average age is 98. But seriously, I liked the fact that I wasn't the one getting passed all the time.
• There's a sign at the Northwest Airlines desk that says "Toy Weapons Must Be Checked In" or something like that. I would have snapped a picture, but my camera was in my suitcase and already checked in. I'm not sure what to make of this strange requirement and I didn't bother asking what I'm supposed to do with my "Real Weapons"--which was probably a good idea.
• If you are exhibiting at a trade show that hands out free booze on the show floor, you'll see many more people at your booth than when you're a trade show that does not hand out free booze at the trade show. It's science.
• If you're ever in Orlando, go to the Winter Park area and eat at a Turkish restaurant called Bosphorous--yummy.

That's it. I wish I had more to say, but I'm at busy at work and actually quite tired.

I Left My Wife This Morning...

Ok, so I'm stealing Scott's idea from Honey, I Fed The Kids. To be more precise, I had to leave town this morning for a three day business trip to Orlando. I don't travel too much (5-7 times a year), so I don't think it causes too much of a strain on Miss Sniz, but I know she's not loving the fact that I'm looking out the window at a palm tree while she (it's only Orlando, folks--don't get too excited) can only see gray skies and snow. Those of you who pray--please do so for my wife.

I don't have much to say today other than the fact that I want to report on a guy that was on the plane. I didn't actually have a conversation with him, but I could hear everything he said because he was standing behind me having a conversation with the guy in 7D. Here's what I know about him:

• He sat in first class
• He lives in Orlando
• He makes the Orlando/Indy flight on a very regular basis
• He has a family (sounded like wife and kids)
  
• He knows most of the flight attendants by name
• He picks up food for them whenever he makes the flight.
  
• He rubbed the arm of one of the flight attendants way too much
• He works in the automotive sales industry
• He makes a lot of money (or at least wants everyone to know that he does)
• He referred to most of the ladies on the plane as, "darling, toots, sweetie," etc.
• He makes 30 pounds of beef jerky at home every month
• Instead of saying that the guy in 7D could "hang" out with them, he said that they could "hack" out with them. I'm not sure what that means.
  

Now, it's up to you, fine readers everywhere, to make up more facts about this guy or even create a story. He also needs a name as I didn't catch it.

Off to my trade show.

57 Weird Fact Things About Me (I was double-tagged)

I don't normally respond to "tags" or "memes". In fact, I'm not exactly sure what a meme is. I think I had a meme one time when I was seven and the doctor removed it for me. However, I was "tagged" by both Scott of Honey, I Fed the Kids and Elisa of My Journey Begins Now! for the same thing on the same day. So, I'm interpreting this as some sort of special revelation. To be precise, Scott tagged me to write "5 Weird Facts about me" and Elisa tagged me for "7 Weird Things About Me." I did the divine math and came up with "57 Weird Fact Things About Me." I don't care about the "rules" of the tag. I just feel like responding to them. However, I DO think it would be interesting to hear from my pal Uvulapie and his wife Uvalapie's Girl. I'd also like to hear from scott at Java Jesus, but his blog may not be the right place to respond.

Here goes...

1. I count my steps when I wake up and when I walk down the stairs in the morning. I have no idea why I do this, but I do.
2. I am used by many of my friends as a telephone information service. I actually USE my cell phone's handy contact list to keep all of this information which makes it very easy to call people. Instead of emulating this behavior, my friends have chosen to harness it and take advantage of it...and, thus, me.
3. I'm a sucker for movies, tv shows and commercials with talking pets--especially dogs.
4. I've never been out of the country (i.e. the United States). I've looked at Mexico from the border in Southern California, but I've never stepped foot on foreign soil.
5. I've memorized most of the movie Fletch...and Meatballs and Anchorman (which is wrong, I'm sure).
   
6. I make up weird things to say in place of today's more popular colloquialisms. Sure, I slip up every now and then and say the actual word, but I'm much more famous for screaming, "Cats!!!" when someone cuts me off while driving. It just feels good to scream out something. Sometimes the things I say are not even words.
   
7. There are a few people on this planet that "get" me. And I mean, they "get" to hear all of the disturbed things I come up with and they don't disown me. My wife has learned this art very well and then there are probably a handful of others.
8. When I was a kid I wanted to be an ornithologist. I even wrote it down on my "Big Dog of the Week" interview from 7th grade.
9. There is no # 9.
10. When I see myself in a mirror and I'm alone (or think I'm alone) I almost always make a weird face.
11. I sometimes sweat like a banshee dog in bed. I'm not even sure what a banshee dog is.
12. If I happen to look up at telephone poles passing by while I'm driving or riding in a car, I feel the need to click my teeth or move my toes up and down in between the poles. This makes NO SENSE AT ALL, but I do it. In fact, there were a whole bunch of odd things like this that my in-laws all shared with each other one time at a late-night family card game. I wish I could remember all of them. Even I thought some of them bizarre...and I'm me.
13. There are a lot of words that I find funny: robots, monkeys, grannies, cats (see #6), gravy, ninja, to name just a few. When you combine these words to make phrases or sentences, they're even better (e.g. The fighting Ninja Robot Granny Monkey Cats eat gravy to gain their super strength.).
14. I was once a stand-in blind date because a friend of mine couldn't make it. I married her. So far, it's been a great date!
    

15-57. Come up with on your own or just keep reading this blog.

BLISS BLOGS (follow-up to MAN BLOGS)

I got a very nice response from the recent MAN BLOGS!!! entry. The neatest thing was reading the comments from some of the wives of the men from the MAN BLOGS. It made me realize that there are several husbands and wives that blog separately. I can only hope that it's been as rewarding for them as it has been for me and Miss Sniz. So, in case you're not aware of these blogs, I'm going to share them with you. Feel free to visit them sometime.

1. Uvulapie & Uvulapie's Girl (formerly Hoffman Homemaker) - These two have the same sense of humor and their blogs complement each other very well. It's nice that the mental institution where they live allows them to have access to the internet and to have blogs. I talked about Uvulapie in my MAN BLOGS post. However, I didn't reveal the fact that he and I have recorded quite a bit of music together and that he wears lederhosen to work. Uvualpie's Girl is currently expecting...a baby (or a baby Elmo).











2. Honey I Fed the Kids & Still His Girl - I have not personally met these folks, but I feel like I know Scott. We've even exchanged a few e-mails and he's promised to mow my lawn all summer for me this year. He's in ministry and I'd say his blog and sense of humor are very similar to mine--which should explain the lawsuit. I haven't had any contact with Still His Girl, but my wife has. This is another pair of bloggers that do a great job of connecting their sites online. Each blog stands on it's own, but they're even more interesting when you follow both.











3. Mr. E & All Rolled Into One - These two are still pretty new to me. In fact, I didn't even know about All Rolled Into One until she sent me a comment about the MAN BLOGS post. This couple is open and honest when it comes to their lives in blogland. They're also serious about taking steps to be better people.











4. Big Doofus and Miss Sniz - Hey, that's me and my lovely bride. Thanks for reading our blogs and being our friends.











If you know of another couple that blogs, please let me know. I'd like to create a follow-up to this sometime and read more blogs like this.

Things I think and think that I hear

If you're a regular reader of this blog or someone that knows me (who is not incarcerated) then you understand that I'm not normal. My sense of humor is...off. The other day I was sending an e-mail note to a new co-worker who works on the other side of the country and I jokingly put at the end of the note, "I love you." Of course, I didn't send it, but WOW...that would have been funny--and awkward. He'd always feel uncomfortable around me. How strange that I would even think about that and that I'm still laughing about it now.

Only a few minutes later, I THOUGHT I heard something really strange--but I know that it didn't really happen. Another new co-worker was walking around by my office and I overheard the beginning of a conversation between him and one of our co-owners. This new guy is a very large man (we're talking "professional wrestler" large). He walked up to the co-owner and introduced himself as the two of them had not yet met. Then, I thought I heard the co-owner (who is probably 5' 10" and weighs less than 150 pounds) ask the big fella, "Are you ticklish?"

Of course that's not what he said...right? But I really heard it (memo to self: get ears checked or at least remove excess ear wax) and started laughing in my office. I couldn't explain why I was laughing.

So, that's a day-in-the-life of me. Now get back to work or whatever it is that you were doing.

Snip and Snap Update

Yesterday we had my youngest daughter and her connected-at-the-hip cousin/best friend together in the van. These are the two that I and Miss Sniz have referred to as "Snip and Snap" (see "Snip and Snap on Adulthood" and "things you brag about when you're 8") They are, among other things, notoriously slow when it comes to doing things like getting ready, getting into the van, getting out of the van, getting dressed, running into the house to get their Build-a-Bears, etc. Well, we were waiting on them to get out of the van and I made the mistake of saying, "Come on, Snip and Snap. Get out of the van." They both looked up at me and glared with excitement. They thought that was the coolest thing in the world and they were calling each other Snip and Snap (and figuring out which one was Snip and which one was Snap) for the remainder of the evening (as far as I know because they were getting dropped off at the grandparent's home). I just hope they're not keen to the fact that we've been writing about them on our blogs.

MAN BLOGS!!!!

I'd like to start out the new year by identifying a few Man Blogs that I've really learned to appreciate lately. Ladies, don't get mad at me for not pointing you out. I really believe that you all have it figured out with this blogging thing and it's been an inspiration for me. However, I'm personally motivated by the guys I know (or sort of know) who blog. I have not met most of these folks, but they inspire and speak to me daily--or just make me laugh. Here they are in no particular order (i.e. I'm not playing favorites):

A. Uvalapie - Ok, I've actually met this one. An old friend.

2. Honey, I Fed the Kids - Husband and daddy of 4 girls. Great writer.

iii. Java Jesus - A theology blog headed up by one of my old youth group students.

d. Mr. E - Seems to be a genuine, humble man with a heart for God.

V. Tappity Tappity - Have not met him, but we talked online while playing Halo 3.

SIX. Reflections In Life - Randy seems like a guy that has been through a lot and has so much to share with people who are willing to listen. He's also a Reds fan, which is cool.

If I missed you, I'm sorry. In fact, let me know and I'll create a follow-up post.