Thursday, February 5, 2009

Cursing the Biblical Way

If you really feel the need to tell someone off with colorful language but feel the restraint of your walk with the most high God, here's a resource for you:

CLICK HERE FOR THE BIBLICAL CURSE GENERATOR!

Here are some great examples that I got today and plan on using at my church leadership retreat tomorrow:

Behold, thou shalt be as welcome as a fart in the queen's bedchamber, O thou wayward winebibber!

O that thou wouldest accidentally insult Goliath, O ye denizen of the underworld!

Woe unto thee, thou Mesopotomian harlot, for you will fall under a speeding chariot!

6 comments:

Elephantschild said...

I think all bible translations except the KJV are a pile of lying Girgashite in the armpit of Satan!! Bwahahaha!


(Not really, of course. I'm an ESV girl - the English Sanctified Version. Tee-hee. And I like the Psalms in Coverdale's Translation - like in the 1928 Book of Common prayer. Moab is my washpot!)

Frank Gillespie said...

My first hit was "Hear this, O ye who art a byword for idiocy, for you will be kicked by an incontinent camel!" Exactly.

Mr. E said...

Cool I needed this when I taught 8th Grade! Now I can use it on the kids and my other enemies. (then I will pray for them of course)

Rebekah said...

Behold, thou shalt go on a diet of crunchy, unsweetened locusts, thou plaything of Beelzebub

hmmmm- I think I ate some of those locusts last night when I thought I was eating a fiber bar

Rebekah said...

Behold, thou shalt go on a diet of crunchy, unsweetened locusts, thou plaything of Beelzebub

hmmmm- I think I ate some of those locusts last night when I thought I was eating a fiber bar

Randy said...

Roger,

This one is old and I may not remember it correctly but it says:

"May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits!" Now, talk about restitution! Ha.

Randy